I think I'm halfway through the first draft of my first novel. I should be ecstatic, but I’m struggling.
From all I’ve read within the writer's community online, this is pretty normal. But it still bothers me. The story has driven itself so well up until now. I've already written the answer to the mystery, and the protagonist's reaction. Now I’m afraid what I have planned for the second half (or last third) may not be good enough. I'm afraid I might have to rewrite or delete large portions of what I've already written - and I LIKE what I've written so far.
I'm afraid the whole story will move too slowly for the average reader. I'm afraid I won't be able to reach the story's best audience once it's ready to publish. I'm afraid I'm wasting my time trying this author thing. But I'm really enjoying myself!
I'm writing the story of one woman's journey to find physical, emotional and psychological healing after overwhelming trauma. The novel is meant to be a slow, unraveling puzzle. She can't heal her memory quickly, or she wouldn't have gotten herself into the situation she's in - right? The story has to move at the pace of her healing - right?
So... I shouldn't stop. I should continue on. I need to trust the work I've already put into this story and let it drive me forward.
I need to trust my own journey.
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